I saw the above video the other day and it inspired me to try to get the ‘One Man Army’ achievement on Grand Theft Auto IV. By coincidence, I had gone to the same Cluckin’ Bell. I assume you’ve figured out that I failed. Yep. I failed big time. I was about two and a half minutes into it; I called Dwayne to get backup and he said he’ll be right over, or his crew will be right over – then I died. Oh, well.

In order to procure the One Man Army achievement, one must withstand five minutes on a six-star wanted level. This is not for the faint of heart. It’s tough! And you have to be quick with your weapons and with tact (i.e. your head).

Here’s what I learned from that ONE experience:

1. Buy all the ammo your weapons can hold [check]
2. Don’t forget the body armor [yep]
3. Pick a spot indoors [uh-huh]
4. Hide behind a wall or duck behind a counter [alright]
5. Always make sure you have a getaway vehicle nearby [okey-dokey]
6. Win the One Man Army achievement [yeah, right]

The hospital is the perfect place for a 6 star shootout. The entrance door acts as a deterrent for bullets. Plus, if you’re quick, you can score some soda from the soda machines to replenish your health.

I guess it’s time to strap up the old boots and cause some fiscally horrendous damage.